aprilgal_lavender

I'm back after a month of study break.

J2 Farewell Assembly tomorrow. They might not be the only ones crying I suppose. I'm gonna miss my 25th Comm; all the memories we shared, be it bittersweet or just pure fun. I will miss those mornings at Umbrella Area, those hyper birthday celebrations, those kayaking sessions, those 'Bully Gandu' moments, those study sessions @ Reading room and library and even Odac Store, all the little moments shared with each and everyone of them (Kerby Tan, JoyceHo, JoyceKhoo, WeeSiong, Angela, Verna, Biru.. etc) .. I guess all these will forever be a part of memory after tomorrow..

I'm gonna miss all my 0808 lovelies.. My awesome classmates for a year. I'm so gonna miss my dearest Joji, LiangJiun, ZheChaw, Jiwei.. and all my other friends. I missed shouting at WeeSeng to shut up, I miss planning class activities with Joji and Liang Jiun.. It's a real pity I didn't get to finish the journey with all of them..

I'm already missing all my BFFs. I guess after tomorrow.. Oh wells, all the best for A levels. Study hard and pia all the way for the remaining month. Jiayous my dears!

Post-promo activities were awesome. But it also goes to mean I burnt a huge hole in my wallet when I'm just 2 weeks into the month. How great, I'm gonna starve for the remaining month. (Not like it's unusual for me to starve, I'm living on caffeine for the past IDK how many months, lols.)

I love Pastamania!!! I still haven't satisfy my cravings for Ice-cream buffet though. But I guess it'll have to wait, seeing how broke I am currently. Movies, Kbox and pool with my dearies were awesome to the max too.

I'm so enjoying my post-promos life now. But 21 October (next Wednesday) might just be the end of my awesome life. I'm really not confident for any papers. I'm so doomed..

"Cry away your sorrows
Dry your face after that
Move on
Great things await you" -Eugene (My 2star kayaking coach)



More Than A Memory lyrics (Hoobastank)

I've become tired of wasting my time

It's been on 2 occasions that I was missed out totally. Are we still what we termed ourselves to be? Not that status matters. It's just that, I am beginning to wonder what went wrong and does the issue lies with me..? And no, I'm not paranoid. It's because I truly care. About this, about us.

I almost felt like packing my bag, get an early leave form from the General Office, and head straight for home right after morning PE. I was staring at the disastrous result slip and somehow I could already feel hot tears welling up at the back of my eyes, ready to roll down just by one slight little trigger. I so hate whatever I saw.

'AAAFA'

I know I should have calmed myself down before the damn test. You know, some years back before I sit for my P5 math mid-year exam my friends were like telling me how they were so going to fail and such. And results spoke for itself; I was the one who failed while all the rest were like getting zomg-super good results? Ha. I know, why should I even let all the negativities get the better of me and affect my performance? It could only mean one thing - I have no control over my thoughts and emotions.

Yeah yeah, why bother about such lame test? Some would say, trying in vain to comfort me and my dejected soul. How should I put it? I have always been putting much emphasis on this, yes this damn, test. I know I can achieve the desired grade that I want and I never would have fall short of my goal given my determination. But somehow, these 2 years really downright traumatised me so much that I am beginning to feel super unfit and I am under-performing. I don't know, somehow the teachers pinned much hopes and held high expectations of me; I felt pressurized to meet their expectations, and felt rotten if I could not, which thereby seriously dampened my mood and dashed my confidence. I know, I shouldn't do it for others but myself. Yes yes, I know. But whatever the others expect of me is also what I expected of myself. Today marked the worst da